Anonymous sex hookups
I've always been the type of person who gets physical fast, and being married hasn't changed that.
I don't keep my marriage a secret from the guys I date — I don't take off my rings and I mention my husband and kids in front of them — but I also don't make it an issue. I feel like my work, thanks to all those business trips, has made it easy to fall into them without doing much damage to my everyday life.
Often, they're cheating as well, and I feel there's an unspoken code about what we do and don't discuss. I haven't said "I love you" to anyone else since I met my husband, and I do sometimes wonder how my husband feels toward the women he meets.
I know — and hope he knows — that very few women would put up with a similar type of relationship, and I think that understanding is part of the bedrock of our bond.
And little by little, we reached the point we're at now, where both of us occasionally have affairs on the side but always come home to each other.
Normally, the guys I have affairs with are men I meet through my job — I travel a lot — as an event coordinator, at parties, through friends of friends, or even old flames I've reconnected with on Facebook.
And then, without drawing up any official rules, we embarked on our anything-but-traditional relationship.
One of us would always act out if cheating was against the rules. What if we both admitted that, yes, we were sometimes tempted, and that sometimes we acted on that temptation?Notice that I didn't say we're in an open marriage — we're not.An open marriage is transparent, with agreed-upon rules and an understanding of what both parties will and will not do with others. I recognize what Frank and Claire Underwood have in although I like to think my husband and I aren't as soulless as their characters. He was the only boyfriend I've ever told the truth to about how many men I'd slept with, because I believed that no matter what I said, he'd never judge me. After about six months of late-night booty calls, Dave and I settled into a proper relationship and started calling each other boyfriend and girlfriend. After not hearing from him for an evening, I'd go ballistic.I liked my coworker, but I know I pushed us into romantic territory fast because I wanted to feel desired. I ended my affair, and for the next six months or so, my husband and I recommitted to our marriage and our family.
My husband and I had some huge fights during that time, and we both uttered the word "divorce." But deep down, neither of us wanted that. And once we settled into a comfortable rhythm of life with a baby, we both began relaxing into our old routines. I flirted with men when I went out with my single girlfriends.
The arguments started up again during my first pregnancy.