Dating commitment phobic

06-May-2020 11:00

None of us knows what the future holds; all you can do is make a sensible choice and put all you’ve got into making it work.

Let them know anyone who loves, makes themselves vulnerable. Point out people they or you know who’ve split up and are now happy again: they will survive. Changing your commitment needs – like deciding you don’t need to move in/get married/have a boyfriend or girlfriend who actually turns up to family do’s – won’t make them stay and will make you unhappy.

Meanwhile the woman will also want to have her man around long enough that he can help to support and protect both her and the baby. It's an age old struggle but fortunately one that women usually win (that's the good news).

Another biological aspect to consider here is the fact that women have much more of a 'time limit' than men when it comes to these things.

One parent died or their parents divorced and they saw the fall-out.

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However for a woman, the childbirth process takes much longer and can only be repeated several times.

Commitment phobes don’t like showing vulnerability: the more you see under the surface, they more power you have over them. Spell it out nice and slow for them as you mention the other two no-nos – the ‘l’ word and the ‘m’ word (living together or marriage) – and watch their reaction.

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