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With an estimated 15 million users in North America by 2011 alone, niche dating sites have proved triumphantly effective. Fake It Till You Make It Online dating takes guts, so the more you have (or can feign), the better you’ll do.
Not simply because they create “culturally relevant communities,” Slater writes. In Slater’s book, he sits down with the man many refer to as the Ray Kroc of dating, Ross Williams. The goal, then, is to rise above the insecurity and present the best version of yourself. “Some are better actors than others,” Williams admits.
But it’s likely you know your own hottest look, so use it.
Ok Trends, a complementary blog to Ok Cupid that explores the data of online dating, presents powerful evidence to back up Rudder’s “hot” rule: a woman deemed hot by one study received four times as many messages as an average one—and 25 times as many as an ugly one.
She switched teams, allowing herself to study her female competitors through the eyes of a man.
More importantly, sites like and Large and Lovely Connections create “judgment-free zones where the like-minded can mingle freely and furtively.” Convinced you’re a vampire? Williams, CEO of White Label Dating.com—a platform that helps companies to build new dating websites—says the key to online dating begins with recognizing that everyone else you’re interacting with is in the same boat. Textbook example: Andrew, a 31-year-old architect bruised from an eight-year relationship that went sour, gained confidence after more than 1,000 women looked at his profile.
Mojo restored, he added a witty ultimatum to his Ok Cupid profile: “Contact me if you can ride a horse.” Sure enough, Jennifer, a 30-year-old horse trainer, sent him a message.
In online-dating speak, these inactive users are known as “date bait.” Their presence on the site inflates the number of messages sent.
It’s a fine line, one that users should continue to question: “What’s fair in love and business? Get Your Hand Out of the Cookie Jar It’s one of the biggest pitfalls Slater warns of in the e-dating field: choice overload.After their first date, she asked if Andrew wanted to come see her barn and her apartment. Six months into their relationship, Andrew is proof that a little moxie goes a long way. If You Got It, Flaunt It Christian Rudder, co-founder Ok Cupid.com, is brutally honest.